Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Thank you for coming to my life

When we were young,i had learnt a lot of things from you,perhaps you don't know,but you're really awesome. Thank you for coming to my world and change my life (i pretty sure you don't know about it,but it is true),when i were small,you're my role model,because of you,i had put a lot efforts for myself,study hard for my UPSR so that i can entered to SMK Chung Hua,Miri (the famous school in Miri that time),so i can see you everyday in the school.

I have no idea why everyday i see you,i have the stronger motivation,i very very sure that's not called the love of relationship,i'm sure about it because i had fallen to a man before,the feeling was totally different.I like you naive,optimistic,and your kindness,generous,everything so on.all these had influence me,you have the power to shine my world until i truly believe that you are the angel that God send to my world.

Argh,suddenly i have the answer in my heart that why i like to near you~~~~~~~


the answer is.....................................................


You HAVE the HEART of WORSHIP
that's why i want to near you!!!
you put God as your everything,don't you?
why am i so stupid until now just get the answer?
the reason is so simple 
you know,every time see you,i can see Him onto you
I mean it...
And i always learn something great from you
i like your heart of worship

hey,friend
perhaps i should call you sis~
don't you know you are awesome?
don't you know you have the heart of worship?
don't you know you had influence someone's life before?
i pretty sure you definitely have the great testimonial in your life
Thank you for coming to my world have teach me a lot of things
Thank you for willing being my friend
Thank you for still caring me when you are study oversea
Thank you for not forgetting me while you celebrate the Christmas oversea
I don't know that will you read my blog or know i'm writing about you
and i don't know what will you think after read it
but i do really treat you as my friend of friends,my sister
wish you all the best=)




Sunday, December 25, 2011

A surprise Christmas 2011

Yep,what a surprising Christmas gift for me this year
first of all,thank you for the big presents
i like it sooooo much
it's so cute and adorable
until i don't want to let go
even the sleeping time
hahahaha

and this morning,
a junior gave me a surprise with her voice
it's so amazing when i heard it
really surprising me
touched my heart deeply
my tears dropped off
i guess this is a blessing from God
through her,i see Him
she have a wonderful testimonial,i guess
hahaha

anyway,i think the biggest present of my life is Jesus Christ
without Him,i won't be able to live as a good girl
He changed my life when i was in secondary school
today is His birthday
i would like to say Happy Birthday to Him
and sing a birthday song to Him:
     "happy birthday to You
      happy birthday to You
      happy birthday to Jesus
      happy birthday to You~"
happy birthday to You,Jesus
thanks for coming to the world
and gave us a light and hope
i know
we are the reason that You gave Your life
we are the reason that You coming to the world
suffered and died
thank you for giving the surprise Christmas gift
I am sure this would be the greatest and meaningful gift in the world

regards this song"we are the reason"to all my friends and family
Merry Christmas and having the blessing year in 2012
through Him,nothing is impossible=D

As little children we'd dream of Christmas morn
And all the gifts and toys we knew we’d find
But we never realized a baby born one blessed night
Gave us the greatest gift of our lives

We are the reason that He gave His life
We were the reason that He suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

As the years went by we learned more of our gifts
The giving of ourselves and what that means
On a dark and cloudy day a man hung crying in the rain
Because of love 
Because of love 

*Chorus

I finally found the reason for living
It’s in giving every part of my heart to Him (every part to Him)
And all that I do every word that I say (you know I’ll be saying)
I will give all my life just for Him, just for Him (every thing for Him)

We are the reason that He gave His life
We are the reason that He suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave all He could give (all that he could give all)
To show us the reason to live

He is the reason to live
(don’t you know do you know the reason
that he came, oh he came to save us
when he gave his life for us) he suffered and died
To a world that was lost He gave everything (everything that He had He gave)
To show us the reason to live


below is the Mandarin version of we are the reason

当我小时候,我常梦见圣诞夜。有那么多礼物为我预备。
     但那时我却不知,有一婴孩为我而生。给我生命最大的礼物。
     他为了我们献出他一生,他为了我们甘愿痛苦受死。
     为这失落世界他给与他所有,并给我们生命意义。
     随着逝去的岁月我渐明白,真正的礼物是为爱牺牲。
     在那阴暗的一天,有一人悬挂十架上。是为了爱,是为了爱。
     我终于找到生命的意义,是将我整个心灵完全交给他。
     在每天我所做,每天我所说,所有一切全是为了他,为他,啊~

Friday, December 23, 2011

神的创造,世界的奥妙

每一次看到有关动物的新闻时
我内心的血狂热了起来
总是有一股很强烈的欲望
参与这些活动
包括领养和助养
有时候疯了起来
还想要自愿当义工

我有一个愿望
那就是想开一间收留所
专门收养在外流浪的小动物
好让它们至少有一个避风港
我并不是要做伟大的人
因为人是不完美的
况且我的缺点像海边的沙那么多
只是我不忍心看它们在外过着提心吊胆的生活
不忍心看它们饿肚子
不忍心看它们过马路要看车
不忍心看它们被狼心狗肺的人虐待
太多的不忍心了
我实在不能站在原地袖手旁观
我做不到

今天我偶然看到一个网站-WWF
看到一则很令我新奇的事
老虎也需要助养
我觉得很特别
原来在大马老虎已经是不超过500只了
啊,这样下去,老虎会绝种的
我看那只老虎的照片时
觉得它还蛮可爱的
我的那一股欲望又来了
我好想好想助养那只老虎
不止老虎,我还想要助养
熊猫,海龟和人猿
它们也需要关心的
它们也是世界的一分子

身为人类的我们
应该要好好爱护它们
因为它们的寿命不多
也没人类那么厉害
会思考,会表达,会哭会笑
它们不会,所以它们需要我们

我决定明年参与这项活动
(今年严重缺钱T.T)
不多,一个月马币30
马币30
可以帮助它们,保护它们
可以让它们吃得好,住得好
何乐而不为呢?
一顿午餐大约5马币
一个月少吃6餐就可以帮到它们了
我希望可以有多点人来参与这类似的活动
http://says.my/cornzaifreak/wwf-
这是我看到的网站
我很希望很希望可以帮助它们

不要漠视这个世界
把爱传出去
冷漠就可以变成爱

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Life is unpredictable

It’s really hard to accept that your beloved friends had passed away.
It’s really hard to accept that you can’t see their smile anymore in your life.
It’s really hard that you have to live in the world without them.
It’s really hard to forget them until you died.

Sometimes just can’t even control myself to think it. Once I’m thinking that I lose them, I can’t talk to them; see them, I very scare, very afraid. I can’t believe it can be true and so reality because I thought it is only can be seen in movie or drama only. How I wish all these happen it’s just a movie. A 3D movie. After movie, they were standing in front of me and surprised me. BUT, I just am lying myself. They won’t back anymore. NEVER.

I never try to accept the truth because I don’t have the courage to face it. Every-time looking the photo, thinking back to the memoir, it warms my heart. They were just standing beside me, talking to me and we were laughing together. But when I touched them, they’re disappeared. I know, they’re gone.  It was my imagination, it was my missing. I cried is because I miss them so much. I cried is because I know I have no chance to see them again. I cried is because I know they couldn’t achieve and strive their dreams anymore. I cried is because I can feel what their feeling when taking the last breathes in the world.

My heart is pain, is really pain. Especially seeing their parents crying, I know they have more pain more sadness than me 100 times even more. Living under 1 roof so many years, suddenly losing their child in blink of eyes, how could they calm down themselves?1 family member gone, the house looks like very quiet and silent. Every corner have the sweet memoir with them, it is hard to not to thinking it. It’s hard.

Life is unpredictable. This second you still can breath, but you wouldn’t expect what will happen in next second.

Rest in peace

Sunday, December 4, 2011

when G-box meet with the kids by Jesus's love

G-box activity is finishing,today
G-box is the shoe box project for the needy children
the mission is to demonstrate God's love in a tangible way to needy children around the people in Sarawak and to share the Good News of Jesus Christ together with the local churches. In other words, it is creating a simple platform for the Christians to be involved in helping the needy children.

what a great+meaningful activities
I'm regretting why i don't join it as the volunteer
(i only join as the one who buy the presents and give to them)
I should have the big confidence to God that He will arrange all the things to me
including the exam,it doesn't effect to the activities in Nov
NEVER!I just gave myself ton of excuses
i'm telling myself,next year,
next year i will join G-Box as the volunteer and adopter
anyway,i can feel the child s's happiness and joyful after receiving the presents
they have the sweet+innocent smile which show on the face
through the photo(thank you for posting it,photographers)
the most important things is the volunteers share the gospel to the kids
so that they could know about the Jesus when they are young
God have His plan to us and kids!
hope they can believe in God as their Saviour in their life
Christmas presents+gospel+blessing from God
                           =
Great+awesome+meaningful Christmas


He is the light of the world
a belated Happy Thanksgiving day+an earlier Merry Christmas to all of you

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

the second exam day and today

haha,the 1st day of exam is strategy management subject but then i didn't pay much attention on this subject because i have not doing the revision before day and i woke up very late the second day until i really have no much time to do revision,i just take a look for my note.That's it!Now i know why the smart students can get the excellent result since they always say they did not do the revision hardly.The reason is paying more than 100% attention in the class is enough.I just wrote the answer that i remembered what the lecturer taught in the class...Thanks,Mr.John Sammy make me attracting to your classes.

Well,i finish my exam in 30 minutes.It really fast,right?i can't believe with myself with this record.Oh,Gosh,i never have such this confidence before.Staying around 1 hours and more at admin office,i have no idea why i'm staying there,waiting friends?perhaps.After that,i bought some snack and soft drink for that night BBQ.I been invited by Jeak to go to her house for gathering. She is my junior and we all do love her so much because she is cute,everyone treats her like the princess.Back to topic, i went to her house around 6pm,because i were taking afternoon nap.That day,i was totally forgot about my exam.Absolutely!i played, i chatted,even stayed over night.One of my weaknesses is i do not know how to reject people.I admit that.

haha,that night,we all played with some crazy action and thinking.i found that we have an awesome imagination.Absolutely!And,we played the dancing street with PS2.Basically such this game only can be found in arcade but jeak got it.Boys and girls played crazy that night,and me,do really forget my exam,genius.After that,i went to jeak's room,and....her room is just like what the movie shown especially in the beginning,the scene show a person sleeping in the room and the room looking was........like that.you imagine it because i not gonna to describe it.

and that was my day until the second day afternoon,i back home.i thought i will study my moral but it is opposite.But i didn't.Oh my gosh i can't believe i slept again!!until 5pm,i woke up and study my moral.Guess what happen?i did my best to do my revision already.Seriously.within 1 hours more,i study it as i can.well,i only can say that,that night exam,i only have 50%confidence of it.Maybe i nervous,i forget some information and lost some marks.The objective part i really used M16 tembak for some question.I can't blame anyone because it's all my fault,i didn't study hard,focusing myself and concentrate it.My sixth sense tell me that i can pass my exam but then my grade point 4 is definitely lose.Never mind,accepted,as long as i not going to fail it.

haha,i really tired that night until in the exam i can't focused it,blank on my mind.After home,i rest for a while. And today,i repeated my problem again,never study until a few hours before the exam.Oh no,i not going to do this again,I can't lost my grade point 4 again,my scholarship!!!please,Esther,i beg you,study now!

Monday, November 21, 2011

the day before exam

well,as you know tomorrow is my final exam
nope,it should be today already cause it is 1.13Am now~
and the below is my schedule of doing revision

20-11-2011
10.12Pm-got mood to get my note from my bag
10.15pm-throw it on the bed and continue with my laptop
11.00pm-discuss with friend about jailbreak because i totally have no idea what is that~
11.46pm-Magdalene commented on my status and we are starting to chat in fb.

21-11-2011
12.00am-still chatting with Magdalene but finally 'm doing some things for revision
12.30-don't know what am i writing about in my note,just simply wrote something i can understand
1.00am-finally i done my revision with just copying the point to my note.
1.05am-Magdalene stopped to comment on my status.i guess she is sleeping,good night,Mag.
1.08am-read the note that i wrote just now,i feel so proud with myself,knowing nothing.
1.10am-Argh,stop to do my revision.SLEEP,to be continued in the morning.
1.13am-suddenly wanted to update my blog,so came up updated until now
1.24am-perhaps i should stop my day with this full-stop?GOOD NIGHT.<---full-stop here

i feel so proud with myself,genius here because in this few hours,i know nothing and can't concentrate on it......am i going to show my genius talent in the exam or bringing the dice,throw it for the answer or going to take M16 from Army and tembak the answer?what a pity bullet.LOL

Saturday, November 19, 2011

那些年,我们吃喝玩乐的日子

不知道为什么,今天我很爱看以前所拍的照片,很难怀疑我是否老了,长大了?还是说它们是我的美好回忆?看看以前的我们,脸上一看就知道一副很单纯,天真,爱玩,傻傻的样子,现在看起来有几分成熟的感觉(因为有pimple了),眼神藏着不能透露的心机和一说话可以杀死人的嘴巴。如果说这是大人的世界,我宁可永远像以前一样,做个单纯的傻瓜,被人骗,也不愿去伤人,因为至少我的心不会有罪恶感。

看了看旧照片,有种被安慰的感觉,至少以前曾经拥有真心的时光,我坦白说,我以前不管什么人,什么事情都不用提防,可以很放心,很信任身边的所有一切,可以说以前不知道什么叫压力,什么叫烦恼,就好像童话故事里一样,无忧无虑地生活。发生了什么事,总会有人帮我扛,帮我解决,我就像被人呵护一样,在我周围有一层很强的保护盖。差不多过着要风得风,要雨得雨的日子(不过还没到那个地步)。就连和朋友吵架,都是那种小孩子吵架一样,过几分钟,好像没发生过一样,继续疯狂地去玩。若换成现在,和身边的人吵架,可能还要被缠上一堆麻烦。

其实我想要谢谢我中学的所有同学,尤其同班同学,一直这么地保护我,即使被别班欺负了,你们二话不说,帮我出头。真的,学校都说我们是坏学生,那是因为在他们眼里,有做功课,考试拿好的成绩,又有杰出的课外活动等等的学生,都是好学生,而我们没有这些条件就这样被当成坏学生。其实我们曾经真的有努力过,只是学校不知道罢了。我这样安慰我自己。哈哈,我真的好喜欢我那一班,我们“坏”得可爱,“坏”得单纯,所谓“学生不坏,学校不爱”嘛。。当年的副校长都还蛮疼我们这班的。我的中文老师在我们毕业后,跟我说,我们这班没有别的老师所说的那么坏,虽然有时真的被我们气坏,可是我们也有她喜欢来教课的优点,我们很有创意。我们写的诗,虽然没有好班的优雅,高级,不过还挺有意思的。而我始终觉得我们并不是坏学生,只不过是好玩,有小聪明的学生。

那些年,我们吃喝玩乐的日子真的很怀念。因为现在在这么复杂的生活圈里,不能像以前一样天真,要张开眼睛认识人心;朋友们一个个去读书了,再也没有保护层在我周围了,我必须学会保护自己。啊,好多想念啊。。我想念中学吵吵闹闹的日子,我想念和晶磊他们玩玩的日子,我想念在少团和文慧他们服事的日子,我想念在Ns和柠檬家族相处的日子。都很想念这些日子,当然还有他们。。

感觉我现在在孤军作战,一个人面对所有,偶尔会翻开照片看一看,想一想,笑一笑,我的力量又会被充满了,继续面对这个死不乱的世界。。当然,偶尔会收到他们的关心的mail,问候的message,让我被锁起的心,又再一次热了起来=)

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Kau Melodi yang indah

My last CF in the school today

I appreciate it very much

i did enjoy my time in CF

this was my ideal fellowship in my heart

why WAS?

after today,i won't join it anymore

this is my last semester in my school

and next year gonna study in University


OK,out of topic

come back now...

i would like to say thank you to all of you

especially the leader and the committee

although we are not perfect

In God's sight,we are the perfect one

because we have the heart of worship!

In Jesus Christ,we are the same

every time playing the game

the student,the staff,CEO,the lecturers even the pastors

will join us together

we worship,we played,we shared

all in this together..

i feel so touched because God let me see this that

everyone is the same in His eyes

try to put down all the burden and feel the world

God's creation


And

God understand me

feel my sadness and my disappointment

He did a pretty good planning to me

Some of my friends

some lost in contact around 3 years

some lost in contact 2 years

and i found their news recently

and some of them send me a message

or contact me

i feel so warm

what is this called?

the warmth of friendship,right?

thank you for everything in this

suddenly my tears dropped off


Of course,my convocation is coming soon

and here i would like to say some thank you

thank you to my course mate

for helping me in assignment,presentation even the final exam

help me do the revision

i appreciate very very much

and the lecturers and seniors

specially thanks to Mdm.JC for teaching us a lot syllabus

thank you to Mr.Awang for always help us and interacted with us as the friend's side

thank you to Miss Wong Ping Ping for treat us as her friends more than her students

thank you to Mr.John Sammy for making the class became more exciting and easy to understand

thank you to my seniors-Mei Ching and Pei Pei for always protecting us when we get the unfair treats

and,i personally thanks to my best course mate and friend- Nikki and Yin Ming

thank you for accompanied when i'm sad when i'm cried

thank you for always make me laughed in the class and played the game

i miss the time we made cupcakes

i miss the time we played Left For Dead in CC

i miss it so much...

thank you you alls

without you guys

i can't imagine how my life's goes on

it such a wonderful memory in this 2 years

after the convocation,we gonna separate

i don't know what's you plan in future

but i gonna continue my studies on June next year in University Heriot Watt

anyway,regards my blessing and wishes

all the best,continue to strive your dream and fight for your future

lastly,play this song with my sincerely heart

why i choose this song?

listen to the lyric,it describe all my words in my heart

this is one of the songs in my NS video

the song i had sing in 1 performance

the song i ever recorded in studio with MV

It is meaningful song to me

and now,i would like to share it with my course mate

all the best


Regards,

Esther Lim

Your course mate forever


Saturday, October 29, 2011

再回首Ns的日子

今天blogwalking,走啊走就走到了一个NS朋友的blog。看了看,就看到2009年哪里去了,当然,包括了NS的生活,里头有几个blog有我的名,我越看我越想哭,越看我就越愧疚,他把我越写越好,我更是很难受,为什么?因为之前我和他有一个小小的误会,就因为这个误会,让我做了一个很笨,很不负责任的行为,我提早出营。我不想面对这个人,我一和他说话,我不知道要说什么,也不想和他说话。可是我才知道这只是一个误会,他当初也和我道歉了,是我不领情罢了,回想那时的我真的很小气,可是之后我们还保持联络,也没必要生气那么久啦。对不起,是我太固执了。

然后我document看NS的照片和特制的video,我以为我会很冷静地看,我以为我的情绪不会在波动了,因为2年多已经过去了,我的感觉应该会随着时间的过去而冷淡了,看来这个借口只是拿来骗我而已,我一遍遍地看,我的眼泪很不争气地留下来,原来我还没忘记啊。我的记忆已经慢慢地消失了,有些画面我要看了人家的blog,或者被提起才有印象,我没忘记的是那个感觉,我可以记得我在那里曾经付出我的努力,我可以记得我那时候的开心,甚至令我难过的感觉,我都还记得。

我还记得我那时候很容易生病,也不知道为什么,或许哪里是山上吧,早上特别热,晚上特别冷。我最记得我在那里的第二天,就生病了,喉咙严重地失声,我说一句话非常地吃力,medic的药都不知道是糖果还是普通的vitamin,没有效果的,结果礼拜天要跑去pharmacy买药才有效果,病了3个星期啊,这是我在Ns的第一个印象。

第二个我记得的是我的柠檬家族,也不知道为什么叫柠檬家族,好象是跟降头有关系的吧,然后柠檬可以解降头,然后就懵懵懂懂地加入了柠檬家族。其实也不错啦,我觉得他们很可爱啊,Magdalene外表看起来很冷酷,其实她是属于慢热性的,和她混熟了,会感觉到她的热情。Linda嘛,她很可爱,整天说要减肥,然后弄出了很多笑话,不知道现在她怎样,她也认识Joshua哦,同一间教会的,太巧了。秀凤,是一个贤妻良母的女生,我觉得我在Ns的日子,真的是靠她度过的,每个早上,就算我有多赖床,她不厌其烦地叫我起身,从5点叫到5.30am,我很感激她为我所做的一切。Dorothy,嗯。。。。,她应该是整个柠檬家族里面最会说话的那一个了,她很聪明,也很开朗,少了她,日子不知道要怎样过,我记得有一次她生病了,我和另外一个成员(忘了是谁了)扶她到medic,也不知道为什么,我那时候竟然哭了,担心吧,我记得她的身体很烫,我陪了她一整个下午,终于烧退了,我才放心。惠萍,这个小家伙,很惹人疼,她长得好像我爸爸朋友的女儿,就这样,我每次被人说偏心,只疼她一个而已,其实没有啦,她看起来就像一个12,13岁的小孩子啊,我怎么看都觉得不像18岁的少年人,哈哈,被她看到这个不知道会不会飞来美里跟我撒娇啊。。Nehz(我不会写她的名字),里面最安静的就是她了,是整个家族里我最少互动的对象,因为我不知道她和我之间相同点是什么,她整个人我看不透,我也在Ns后才开始和她混熟的,是有点慢,至少我们的关系还不错啊,她也喜欢柯南,喜欢侦探,和我一样。彩虹,和我一样,美里人,她很含蓄,羞答答的,跟秀凤最好的了,整天和秀凤拿着camera拍照,她们真的是天生一对。还有一个KL来的Huey Shan,在我眼中,她是女强人,看她走路的样子就知道了,我很喜欢和她相处,可是一和她相处,我发现我的英文变烂了,我说不出来,我有时还会请教她呢~她也很blur,不过她比我更blur,我们2个常常做blur blur的事,就好象在冲凉房里,我们的shampoo可以pass来pass去,我想外面的人看那瓶shampoo隔着一道墙飞来飞去,应该很奇怪吧,哈哈哈,最好笑的是,有一次她把她locker的锁匙lock在locker里,想了很多办法都不能解开,后来我被叫来帮忙时,我就傻傻地用我的locker锁匙去开她的locker,本来这种机率只有百分之一而已,不过看起来我们就是那百分之一,开到了,结果她冲过来抱我一直说谢谢,我也blur blur地说:you're welcomed。

嗯。。。。,我想不到其他的事了,不过我认识了很多朋友,尤其别的种族。幼稚园和小学的时候,我都读华校,所以没有太多的种族的同学,就算有,我们都是用华文交谈,到了中学更不用,整班都是华人,我的中学是国民型学校,自然学生是华人,所以更别指望我们用国文交谈,顶多用英文。所以一进到Ns,我简直就是鸡同鸭讲,她们听不懂我讲什么,我也不知道她们说什么。其实和她们相处也蛮开心的,尤其我的roommate,我学到很多东西在她们的身上也知道一些pantang。我还认识一些华人朋友,像:佩亿,银蓝,ivy,小薇,fatt,红雨,wind,诗云,June还有好多好多朋友一时想不起来(真的对不起啊,memory有限),他们都是很好相处的人。所以我在Ns的日子大多是开心地度过。。我记得诗云和银蓝是吃素的,所以有时候找她们吃饭,会被诗云命令吃菜(那时候我的偏食症实在是太恐怖了),当然现在的我会吃一些菜了,但是别指望我吃青菜,想都别想,吃长豆,苦瓜还可以接受,最不能忍受吃青菜,痛苦啊啊啊。不过刚才看了几个人的blog,我的记忆涌出了很多很多,突然间想起了很多,啊,原来我还有很多开心的回忆啊。怎么说也说不完,不知道要从何写起,太凌乱了,碎碎的回忆,这边一点,那边一点,真怀疑这2年里我是不是患上了失忆症。啊哈~

可惜提早出营,也可惜一些朋友也提早出营,不然我真的想留到最后,不知道现在他们怎样了,我的柠檬家族,我可是常常想你们的哦,甚至我写了歌,但是我不敢拿出来,因为我怕不好听,吓着你们了,当然我手头上还有一些东西还没给你们,本来应该在2年前给,可是拖到现在还没给,愧疚=(

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

美中,曾经有过这一班

美中,曾经有过这么一个班
是一个让老师闻风丧胆的班(我班主任说的)
是一个让prefect心惊肉跳的班(我朋友说的)
是一个叫“Hantu”的班(副校长说的)
是一个有些人认为无药可救的班(我亲耳听过,不说是谁了)
是一个让校方很头痛的一个班(因为上周会,时不时被提起)
没错,那是2007年和2008年,我所读的f4f5
不过上面的形容词有点夸张,也是外人说的
其实我班并没有那么恐怖,那是因为外人不够了解我们
原本我并不属于这一班,我读理科,后来就转班,文科班也只有这一班有account,所以就算没有位置,我也一定要挤进这一班,和校方谈判了2个星期,我总于如愿以偿,也和这班结下了缘分
我喜欢我的班,不是因为够威,有名气
而是因为我班有很多可爱的地方,是大家都没看到的

是,我承认,我们班的确是顽皮了一点,叛逆了一点,爱玩了一点。可是我们这年纪不是比较好玩的吗?
9科科目,大概只有sejarah的课,班上会安静,功课都有做,没人会逃课,因为只有这个老师是我们的克星,也是学校的sejarah panita,有威严,但是我告诉你,这一科也是全部科目里,最多人fail的一科,整班50个人,大概只有不到5个人及格而已


我记得我f4的班主任,常常和我们斗嘴,也常常被我们气到没话说,我每天看我班同学和她斗斗嘴,我都会想笑,因为他们的内容真的很好笑,有时候整班还真的会被闹到天翻地覆,后来我们还帮他取了一个外号“1000号老师”,和她名字一样,我最记得她常说“教了你们这班啊,我的命减了10年”,因为她的好爽,我们上她的课时,也不会有想要逃课的感觉。


到了f5,换了班主任,他好的时候很好,不过坏的时候就真的很不好,他曾经说过,他在情绪方面有点不稳定,所以有时候会忍不住骂了我们,不过我们都已习惯了,不是吗?别说教我们的老师,就连sit-in的老师来到我班,都会骂我们,习惯了。。哈哈。。话说回来,我记得有一次,义卖会的票,是他一手包办买完剩下的票。。他说他只希望我们能在考试中及格就好,不要求什么,只要求及格。。后来我们没让他失望,在Spm放榜时,不止整班及格,就连平时在班拿不及格的,也拿到了B,他看到了我们,他一直说谢谢,谢谢没让他失望。。老师啊,该说谢谢的,不是我们吗?


我还记得f5那年,学校举办了国庆日班上布置比赛,比赛结果很让人意外,别看我们班懒懒散散的,不会读书,只会玩,什么都不会。。我们就在这个比赛让老师们和其他班的同学们掉了眼睛,我们拿奖了,如果没错,应该是冠军,这么重要又有纪念性的日子,在我脑海中怎么变得模糊了。。。原本我们没有想要参加,后来在老师(sejarah老师)的激励下,本来刚开始为了应酬老师,就随随便便画了几张国旗,在墙壁上粘一粘,结果老师不满意,放话说拿了奖,整班加分。。我们sejarah一向以来是最差的,5分对我们来说很重要,结果就拼了。。当然,我们有竞争对手,去年的冠军,有压力。。。当中虽然偶尔同学之间会吵架,意见不合,不过我班可爱的地方是我们不记仇,就像小孩子一样,吵一吵,第二天就没事了。。公布比赛的那一天,就校方念出我班的名时,那个场面是我在美中过了5年,最有感觉的一次,整个礼堂是我们的欢呼声,因为这是我们的努力,也是校方和老师第一次看到我们的付出,我的sejarah老师还说,这是她第一次提出加分的option,加分是老师不可能的任务,遇到我班,老师也疯了,我班还真的有能力让她不得已加分,我们还挺厉害的。。后来有很多别班的同学为了看一看我们这一班的布置,故意走过我班,所以有好几天走廊来过了不少没见过的学生。最高兴的,应该是我们的班主任吧,一年365天接到不少的complaint,总算听到有人称赞我班了。。


还有一个老师,她常常和我们说人生的道理,分享她的故事。。她每次上课,上啊上又扯到她的故事里了。这个老师还蛮幽默的,她从来不骂我们,还苦口婆心地讲了人生道理,她也常常说brassband的故事,去Italy的事也好,training的也罢,她说只要努力,就有成功。。说到这里,在美中读书的,应该猜到这个老师是谁了。。她常常对我们女生说“我们女生不可以靠男生,要努力读书,出社会做工,结婚后,也不可以一直靠老公,老公给的pocket moneytreat it as your bonus….”还有好多好多,我只能说她是一个很可爱的老师,我班的同学也常常问她一些怪怪的问题,尤其英文的vocabularypronunciation之类的。


当然还有华文老师,她很cool,因为她不常笑,她每天板着一个脸来到我班教课,起初我上她的课,有点不习惯,不自然,所以也没太认真地学华文,一直到f5年中,无意中看到她的笑,我开始慢慢地认真地上她的课,原来之前不认真,所以我怎么学都学不会华文,文原文,修辞手法,名句精华等等。。或许老师发现我的认真,交上去的作文,被派回来时,总会有一些评语,是老师给的评语。当中给我最大的激励就是那句“加油”,就在那几个月,我的华文进步了很多,真的进步了很多,甚至我在SPM里拿A,我那时的心情很难形容,因为那是我第一次拿A,可是也是我最后一次拿A,想找老师,很遗憾的是老师已经被派去槟城教书了,来不及的谢谢没说出口,只能用SMS,那一天老师的回信,是我第一次听到老师的祝福,她说,我后期进步了很多,并祝福我未来的路要好好走。。


写到这里,都是和老师的关系。。其实我班的同学人很好,我们外表看上去很强悍,其实你们外人不知道我们很容易哭,我们可以为一些小事而哭,可以为一些话而感动,当然,我们之间的互动常常闹出很多笑话,甚至一些举动可以笑翻肚子,我们班的笑声可以是很恐怖(够大声,够恐怖,你难以想象),可是我可以说那是很真的笑声,因为我们想笑就笑,想哭就哭,想疯就疯,不必理会别人的眼光,这就是为什么我理科班的朋友说,摸不透我们要做什么,因为我们想做就做。。我在这一班完全没有压力,我可以很自由。我班的同学就像小孩一样,就算吵架了,第二天就没事,可以为一件小事而哭而笑,可以为班上付出一些,可以为自己的朋友做一些事,还有很多很多疯狂的点滴,2年的点点滴滴,不是1blog就写的完,不是23天就可以说完,因为我们之间有太多的回忆,数不完,我只能说,我喜欢这个班,真的很喜欢,在美中生涯里,这2年给了我快乐时光,难忘回忆。。

Friday, June 24, 2011

当蜜蜂遇上笨蛋

我想,
应该只有我一个
遇到这么”幸运“的事吧~
话说,

在这么一个美丽又沉静的夜晚
睡觉时间到了
当然是要睡觉咯
死不巧
那一个晚上
我发梦发到一半
突然间觉得口渴
就想喝水嘛~
我就起身下床要去厨房喝水咯~
没想到,就在我下床不久
走不到几步路
那时候暗暗的,没开灯
突然间,我感觉到我的脚趾头
一阵痛
我以为我踩到了咬人死不痛的红蚂蚁
我去开灯
结果........
@#$%^&*
我……我……
我竟然踩到黑色的蜜蜂!!
哎呀,难怪啦,痛死了
它的脚还在我脚趾头叻~
好难拔哦~
结果接下来的2天
脚趾头痛痛又痒痒的
肿肿又紫紫的~
由于那根脚趾头有点”难看“
我就索性地用OK傰,纱布包扎到死死的
现在我的脚趾头是有点紫黑色
可能还没好吧~
有时候还痒痒的咯~
到现在我都不知道那只蜜蜂有没有毒的叻~

不过
比起来,
我看蜜蜂的遭遇会比我惨吧
没了一只脚叻~
那时候应该是”负伤逃跑“吧~

算了啦,遇上我这个笨蛋
算你倒霉咯~>.<

Friday, June 10, 2011

phobia

It was a beautiful Saturday
i still remember is 5 April 2008
the day after "ching ming"
as usual
a Form 5 girl was going to school for the co-curriculum
after the activities, it was around 11 am
she was decided to across the road from the school
and she never think there will happened something could affect her whole life
she was so happy that time
but the happy moment is just temporarily
when she across the road
suddenly she heard a car's hoop
A car (highlight) was driving very fast
directed to her
the girl was shocked until she doesn't know how to avoid or run away
she just stand at there,she could not do anything
and she thought she was going to see heavily Father soon
in this few seconds
she could see the past year and the memory
it's appear at the same time
she was so scare that time
Suddenly she heard the car's brake sound
and soon she can feels there had something crash to her
she knew she met the accident
Perhaps she is lucky
Perhaps She haven't complete the mission in the earth from heavily Father
she was survived from the accident
the accident could make her to death
she knew it's the  miracle 
she quickly woke up from the road
she's having a bad hurt especially the left leg and waist
the driver wanted to send her to the hospital
but she rejected
she was so scare her parents know it
she scare her parents will blame to the driver
she scare her parents will scold her badly
she chose to keep the secret 
what a stupid decision 
when her parents asked what happened
she just answered she fall down at the road
in that few days,she feels so pain
especially going to school
she nearly couldn't stand
she was suffering from the pain
once she look at the bruise of her leg
it's blur color
she was so nervous
she scare there something happened to her leg
starting from that time,this girl is scaring to across the road now
she have to confirm there is no car at the road
and across the road
after a year she graduate
she's doing the medical check-up
the doctor asked her ever met an accident before
she answered the question honestly
the doctor told her that
her leg is getting Rheumatoid
and her waist is easy to recurrence
there a lot activities she could not join anymore
she was so sad
and now the girl is thinking back
she feels so so stupid
if she followed the driver to the hospital
and told her parents
these might not be happened
some time she could feel the pain from her waist
an immature decision she made is affecting her whole life
and now this girl have the phobia to learn to drive the car
once she is thinking back to the accident
she couldn't control herself
she can feels her heart-beat
it's very fast until she cannot breath
she know she have to conquest the fear
but...is not easy to do it
anyway,hope she can pass the license
one day,she can prove that she have conquest her phobia in her life
even she have to give up some activities in her life
but it doesn't mean she cannot do anything
she still have other choice,right?
jia you,jia you
awaiting for that day's coming=')









Saturday, May 28, 2011

20年最疯狂的事

有人问我,这20年里做过最疯狂的事是什么
我想了又想,好多哦
例如
中学时,我们就像“恐怖分子”,prefect,老师,甚至副校长都要让我们3分,怕我们铲平了风水极好的学校(=.=)
和朋友在广场像猴子那样跑来跑去,乱喊乱叫 (实在控制不了那个情绪)
和不认识的人搭讪 (那是因为玩真心话大冒险的后果)
中学时,去骂不认识的人 (也是因为真心话大冒险惹的祸)
生病时,以毒攻毒,去吃KFC,冰淇淋 (隔天加重病情,爽啊!)
在老师面前打game (老师最后陪我们玩哦)
和朋友去吃宵夜,整间店都是我们的吵杂声,我们成为了那晚的焦点 (Paiseh死)
在短训煮海参汤不加海参 (有点废)
NS 便秘半个月,哦,不对不对,这不是我的意愿,不算疯狂
嗯~~~哦,有了,在NS里一天只冲一次凉,这个考倒我了
我平均一天冲3次凉,何况NS哦,很长有户外活动,满身臭汗
不是不要冲,而是不能冲啊啊,回想起来,打冷颤 (身体突然冷了一下)

啊啊啊啊,这些不算疯狂啊
我最疯狂的事是Form 6那一年
话说,那时候本来想读Form 6
结果科目大多都是国文 (本人国文可以和小学生相比)
话又说回来,我已经还了学费和MUET的费用
第一天上课其实已经是开课的第3个星期了
那时候NS还没完,我也是提早出来(心痛)
而我开始form 6的旅程
不知道是学校的问题还是我的问题
我竟然不习惯那里的生活
怎么说,看看以下吧:
怪怪的感觉
听闻说那间学校还蛮严格的,我倒不介意
可是
早上一进到学校,我们不能直接进班
要坐在地板等时间上周会
上周会还有一点操步的感觉
什么senang dirirehatkan diri之类的
书包用背的
书本一定要带齐
上完周会,我们还要排队回班
下课时间我们不准留在班上
放学排队回家
上课感觉回到小学
有时留课留到5
我隐隐约约感觉到这间学校不简单
我忍忍忍忍。。。。。
后来我发现form 6并不适合我
或许是我的国文不好吧
也或许学校的生活真的不适合我
决定了,不读了
整个过程只有5天罢了
5天好像5
长长的,也学不到任何一样东西
何况老师也不记得我是谁
最疯狂的事来了
我不读了,对不对?
不读是不是要申请退学?
要办退学手续?
我,没有去做
从此我在那学校消失的无影无终
我在想我的分数应该被Demeritnegative
不用紧,没打算读了是不是
就不在意了
最够力的是,有一天我整理我房间时
我发现一样东西
是一set资料
原来那5天上课
我没有把我的资料,我的CV,和我的form 6资料交上去
也就是说 那间学校是不知道我是谁咯
就算我还了学费,没交上资料
学校也不会有我的资料
酱,学校的budget突然间多了一个学生的学费
酱,老师的点名簿不是。。。。。?!?
酱,我不是做了5天的“偷渡匪???
天啊啊啊啊,太疯狂了吧~~~